Assimilation v. Belonging
Several months ago I was sitting in a training led by a team of DEIB specialists. The objective was to share ideas about how to create inclusive classroom spaces that welcome students from diverse backgrounds. The facilitators shared how things like birth country representation and home language representation in the classroom could go a long way. This led to open dialogue among participants and the discussion quickly shifted to one focused mainly on multilingual learners. Participants shared stories from previous experiences about different ways they’ve made their classroom welcoming. One participant raised their hand and shared:
“I understand all of what everyone is sharing, but sometimes the challenges I have are with things like behavior and class disruption…I also don’t appreciate the disrespect when students don’t make eye contact when I am speaking to them. So, at one point do we start to get these kids to assimilate?”
This question made my heart jump. I thought to myself.. ASSIMILATE?! Assimilation is the process of becoming similar to others by taking in and using their customs and culture. To assimilate is to become part of a group or rather to make or force someone become part of a group. This process often strips individuals of their own unique cultures, traditions and identities.
The idea of creating safe classroom spaces where students feel like they belong has nothing to do with assimilation. Assimilation is the opposite of belonging. The goal is for students to bring their full selves to their classroom spaces and we embrace all parts of their identities, regardless if they are different from our own. The purpose of belonging is so we don’t have to change who we are to be accepted.
Shortly after the question was posed, I raised my hand and very calmly and thoughtfully shared:
“Assimilation is the opposite of belonging. The idea of belonging is accepting students into our classroom spaces as their full selves. The goal is not to change values or beliefs, but instead share parts of who we are as teachers, so that students feel safe to do the same.”
As teachers and as leaders, it is so important that we model what it means and what it looks like to show up as our full selves. It is important for us to share parts of who we are with our students, to celebrate our identities & acknowledge our differences–that’s where the beauty unfolds. Never do we want students to feel like what they look like, where they come from, what they believe, and what they value isn’t ok. Students thrive in spaces where they feel welcome to be themselves.
Understanding who people are and where they come from and ACCEPTING these things creates a culture of belonging. So often students have their guards up or shut down completely when they feel like their acceptance is dependent on a set of conditions. Belonging is unconditional.
Gentle Reminders:
It’s necessary to unlearn and relearn things in order to serve our kids and create the inclusive, liberating classroom spaces that our students deserve.
What respect looks and sounds like varies from family to family, from culture to culture. The same with success, what it means to be successful may look different across lines of difference.
